What others say…

If you have read Am I going Mad and would like to give us feedback, please include your comments below. Thank you.

Am I Going Mad is more than just informative, entertaining and inspiring, it is a must read for anyone ready to integrate and self-actualize their spiritual existence – truly a physiological, psychological and spiritual masterpiece for the sake of human evolution.”

Dr John F. Demartini
Best-selling author of
‘The Breakthrough Experience’


“Eloquently crafted; Marlyse Carroll has written a spiritual classic that will stand the test of time. Am I Going Mad helps any seeker of life accept and understand their true spiritual nature and find relief, gratitude and appreciation for their spiritual quest.”

Derek Barker
Author of ‘A Gift of Gratitude’


“A true treasure trove – Am I Going Mad provokes spiritual acceptance, growth, development and helps the reader understand themselves and the spiritual world in which we live.”

The Veritas Magazine Australia


“I must tell you that Am I Going Mad is one of the greatest books I have ever read. You have helped strengthen a flame within me that I feared at times would burn out, leading me back into a depression. I know now this will never happen.

Because of who you are you change the world and because of who you are you have re-gifted the essence of my life to me. Thank you.”

Marnie Lyons-Campbell


Orange buy now button


“Marlyse gives us so much to think about and be inspired for. Am I Going Mad is both true and fascinating. You will know in your heart when you read this book that this woman knows her stuff.

If only we all could be fully present like Marlyse, the world would be a better place, as it is in understanding and learning that we grow. If you really want to learn then study this book – go mad!”

Deb Webber
Psychic Medium for Woman’s Day and
TV series ‘Sensing Murder’


“I was reading Am I Going Mad on an international flight yesterday when an elderly Indian man walked past me and tapped me on the shoulder for a chat.

Turns out he had read the book – he was a professor of literature and thought it was amazing – talk about synchronicities!”

Lisa Noonan
Auckland NZ

By T. C.
Melbourne, 2009

Waves of bliss roll through my body. I am filled with a warm sensation running up my core, it is similar to the pangs of emotion I felt when I first fell in love. Butterflies. Everything feels amazing, my body, my skin, the air. I have never felt like this before. I am connected, I am something more, we are something more, I belong. All fear falls away and I am left with a sensation of peace. I am 21 years old and I am standing in a room full of people. I have just taken my first ecstacy tablet and I am suddenly awake.

I want this feeling again. I want to belong. I want to feel love. I want to fly. I want my skin to tingle. I want to love the strange sweaty girl I meet in the line for the toilet. I want to hear the best song I have ever heard in my life. I want to say profound things.

But it never lasts and my world becomes darker than before.

I begin to chase one feeling off with another. I search in dark places for light, only to find more darkness. Friends become enemies. Families become strangers.

So many people around me but I make my pleas for peace alone, where no one can hear.

Sleepless nights full of anxiety and fear. I drag myself through the day and spend the evenings between the back porch and the bed. One cone after the other. Hazy numb peace at last.

But like a clear picture suddenly appearing on a TV full of static, my hazy numb peace is interrupted. In and out I fall of two realities. Dreams? Delusions? I don’t know. I’m in between two worlds.

Intense fear of losing control. My heart races until it feels it could burst out of my body. There is nothing I can do. My body turns to pins and needles. I cannot feel my hands. They look twisted, stiff, contorted. Panic, fear, hopelessness. Am I dying?

I fear labels. Deep down I know I am turning mad. So I choose silence.

How long can I live like this before it starts to show? Not long. But it seems I meet the right friends, Xanax, Cerapax, Lithium, Temazapan. They are all here to help.

But, there is something inside me that yearns for something more. A tiny whisper I can barely hear over the chaotic sounds in my head, but I hear it.

I ignore the voice. Another voice? This kind of madness has a name. I dare not say it.

The voice gets louder and I refuse to listen but it still persists. I pray for something, anything. I cry out to the universe in desperation.

I am sent an angel. My angel tells me she too feels mad. I feel relief. I pray to know more.

This time an angel gives me a book.

Am I Going Mad comes into my life. I cannot put it down. Again I feel relief and with the answers to my questions I begin to feel blessed.

The chaos, the drama, the hate, the fear, that is the delusion and I can find peace. I begin to find peace. I can quieten my mind. I can see and hear clearly. I am awake and I see now who is mad.

I learn to meditate. I learn to make space in my mind. I follow my breath. I listen to my heart. I dance. I dance my soul. The chaotic sounds in my mind move further and further apart, and I can be in silence.

I sit in silence, not needing, not wanting. Slowly more fear falls away, creating room for more peace.

I sit in silence, and there is room for more answers. More fear falls away.

I sit in silence, and I surrender.

I heal from the inside out.

And as I sit in silence I remember. I remember that I always belonged. I remember that I am forgiven. I remember that I am loved. I remember that I am.


Orange buy now button

Am I Going Mad is a feast that fed every part of my being. It helped and changed my life and I will forever be grateful.”

Sally Knight


“Bravo! What an extraordinary work–a sensitive, beautiful blending of the concrete, grounding, “scholarly” with the essential, mystic, mysterious, life affirming.

Really, I am in awe of your journey, and in your ability to describe and teach from your experiences – making so much of what could be deemed strange, unexplainable, real – and bridging the gap from the mundane of the newtonian to the extraordinary of the quantum.

I am humbled to be included in your discoveries, thank you.”

Marcia Leventhal PhD.
Dance Therapist
Founder of International Dance Therapy Institute of Australia


“I felt obliged to thank you, you have written the best spiritual book I have read. Your insights and thorough research is nothing short of extraordinary. My wife and I decided to co-op read it so we could discuss each chapter but in the end I could not put it down and finished it today.

Your book I’m sure will greatly assist many people just as it has helped me progress on a spiritual path. It was like lots of little pieces of spiritual jigsaw coming together to form a bigger picture. Something that will help my main objective which is to become a better man, husband, father, son, brother.”

Andrew Berry


Orange buy now button


“Thanks Marlyse, for writing such a comprehensive and sophisticated account of spiritual phenomenon. You have tied everything up, in such a clear and concise manner.

It has given me a deeper understanding on all levels. Finally someone has explained to me the how’s and why’s around the weird or strange things I have experienced. You have made an incredible difference to my personal journey.”

Rebecca McAuley
Diploma Kinesiology ICPKP


“For me, what makes a great book is that I cannot wait to read the next chapter, I get excited by the new knowledge, I spend a lot of time reflecting on what I have read, it personally affects and influences my life. And finally I’m a changed person for having read it.

This fantastic book did all of the above, I loved it!”

Gemma Buenen
Meditation Teacher.


“Hi Marlyse, I have finished reading your book and all I can say is thank you, thank you, thank you… it was speaking right to me. It explained everything about everything I have ever thought about or contemplated, right from the time I was just a child.

I also wanted to let you know, that you maybe should put a warning sticker or something on the chapter about the kundalini experiences at the retreat.. especially as I read it on a train full of other passengers”¦ (I’ll let you ask spirit what I am talking about heheheheh)

Once again thank you so much for writing this book, and I know it will be a big hit all over the world.”

Fadi Zeitoune
Support Centre Analyst


“Hello Marlyse, I finished your book at 2 a.m. this morning, I couldn’t put it down! So so so wonderful. It answered so many questions I had been asking myself, it was like you wrote it for me!! I really acknowledge your courage in putting so much personal material in, it makes the book really really special.

After reading it, for some reason I’m no longer afraid. I feel so much more peaceful and clear, like your book just brought everything together for me and I’m sure it will keep making a difference for me as I read it over and over! I just can’t express my gratitude to you enough Marlyse.”

Wendy Brewer
Meditation Teacher, Shepparton


Orange buy now button


“Wow! What an amazing achievement. Congratulations, it is phenomenal in scope and breadth.

Among the profound spiritual/quantum/psychological publications I am familiar with, yours adds a unique aggregation to that collection. Many other books aggregate information from a particular discipline or “” if they do aggregate across disciplines – it is to provide a roadmap for a growth outcome (outside-in focus).

What you’ve done is provide aggregated information around the single theme of making sense of actual growth experiences (ie. from the inside out).”

Kerim Nutku
BA Psych, MBA, Tavistock Group Relations Graduate,
Team Facilitator and Coach


Am I Going Mad is a great reference book on the links between spirituality, modern science and psychology. It is also a wonderful, entertaining, engaging romp through selected bits of Marlyse’s spiritual journey.

The title itself will resonate with anyone who has begun to unfold their spiritual essence because, by definition it makes no sense to the conscious mind. This is not a journey of the mind, which shrieks its protest… certainly mine does. Am I Going Mad is a courageous, informative, thoroughly researched and caringly created work and I thoroughly recommend it to anyone walking their spiritual path.”

Richard Presser PhD.
spiritual teacher and writer


“Hi Marlyse I have not long finished your book and it is just incredible reading. I understand so much now that I was stuck with. Over the last three years I have become a Reiki Master and the changes have been mind blowing – and now thanks to your book I understand so much more. A true masterpiece.”

Meg Johanson


“Your work is magical and important. You inspired me to write and I no longer fear ultimate reality. I no longer hide in my sad little ego “me” mind…

That book of yours is important. You lead people down a path, standing at the wall of ego, you show how to open doors to inner kingdoms that people then can explore and grow depending on their own ability/karma/openness.

Thank you for moving me toward higher realisations, therefore, in turn I am to do higher good for this world.”

Richard McKinnonӬ


Orange buy now button


“Marlyse, it is a wonderful book. I didn’t want to put it down.

It was like watching a documentary with the 3 voices. You pretty well have a script without too much to do. Hopefully someone will make it into a film ““ that’s a big story though!

Thank you for the simplicity and accessibility. The way you have covered all the modalities and your complete faith and embodiment of what you have written. Congratulation!”

Maria Sangiorgi
Dance Therapist


Book review published in LIVING NOW Magazine
March 2008

Am I Going Mad is both a great read and useful reference book for those on a spiritual journey. Much more than a self-help book, it is also the story and the map of a journey which all of us share.

The author substantiates and presents concepts of spiritual evolution in the context of psychology, quantum physics and shamanism. To balance these scientific foundations, this book also contains true stories which are highly entertaining and emotive. Some of these ‘Gabrielle stories’ have appeared in previous ‘Living Now’ issues.

The combination of up to date information and touching anecdotes is highly rewarding as it allows the book to gradually unfold. The theory is easily understandable yet stimulating to the intellect, whilst the stories stir the senses, heart and soul.

Am I Going Mad has had a profound impact on me: To start with, it has made me feel grateful for having entered my life, and provided scaffolding in my spiritual journey. It has also given me new insights into who I am, why I do what I do, my place in this vast Universe and guidance for further evolution from here onwards.”

Nilanthi Chandrasena


Review published in the VERITAS Magazine
October 2011

Am I Going Mad by Marlyse Carroll is a reassuring book to anyone dedicated to the development of their spirituality.

It provokes a gentle acceptance that spiritual development involves the opening up of your mind, and your existence, to the mysteries of the Universe.

The new experiences that stretch you are just normal – whatever normal is!

During my spiritual development I have indeed questioned my sanity and so even the title seemed to draw me in. And I’m glad it did because this book is indeed a treasure trove rich in brain fodder.

The bonus for me was the tackling of quantum theory, kundalini, annunciating the steps to transformation, the holographic universe and synchronicities.

It is a relatively easy book to read and I could recommend it to the committed ‘learner about life’.”

Ian Harris
Veritas Magazine Australia


Orange buy now button


“I had to write to say how much I loved your book Marlyse. – I could really relate to your experiences and frankness. I loved the content and I thought the format you chose was BRILLIANT.

I do believe I’m now able to love myself and my experience more easily because of your book.”

Eric McColough


“I am very grateful when I read a book and come away with one line that has helped or inspired me. Am I Going Mad did this with every story and every chapter I read.

It helped me understand some of my own experiences through Gabrielle’s stories and her easy to understand explanations and I now feel a lot more sane and comfortable with my own life experiences.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book, it has made a positive difference to my life and for that I am truly grateful.”

Anna Dimitrakopoulos


“I’ve always been very spiritually aware but in more of a religious sense, so I had spent my life up to this point trying to ignore certain aspects of myself.

I suffered a huge and rather unpleasant wake up call in December last year and I’m almost ashamed to say that for a while after that I was terrified of pretty much anything and everything.

But reading your book has really helped me see these experiences for what they are and after embracing them I have found that they really are quite beautiful 🙂 and I now know that I’m definitely not going mad!

So a HUGE thank you for writing Am I Going Mad.”

Hanna Z,
20, student


“I finished Marlyse’s book at about 1.30 this morning – I honestly can’t put in words right now what a great experience it has been for me.

To be totally honest it’s been a life saver in many ways, timely, helpful, guiding, inspirational, loving and moving.

I loved the item that it finished on being the key that Marlyse found there at your property, how beautiful was that!! To me ‘the key’ was very iconic as I feel as though I’ve received the key to a new life, a new awareness, a new understanding of my life and world and my place in it, both inner & outer worlds, and new levels of joy, happiness and communication – thank you again Marlyse!”

Karen Cormack
Web Developer


“The book is fantastic. It has tied together many pieces of experience in my life and events I have shared with others and deepened both my understanding and appreciation of the journey of life.

With that understanding comes more confidence and, interestingly, more courage to consciously walk the path. Thanks!”

Dr Lisa Shortridge


“Your book is awesome. I am loving reading it and am finding it impossible to put down.

I have not yet put my finger on what it is that makes it so compelling (combination of the quality of the content and writing style me thinks) but it is something very special. It is a brilliant book, Marlyse.”

Sarah Reece
Learning & Development Manager,
Barrett Consulting Group

Am I Going Mad is a highly intelligent, thoroughly researched adventure into spiritual existence, evolution and human potential. Highly thought provoking, challenging and entertaining, this book can offer the reader a chance to grow beyond their perceived limitations. There is something in there for everyone. After reading this book, one simple idea, learning to breathe again has already had an effect on my health and happiness.

Mak Makune

Actor & Musician


Orange buy now button


And finally, a few web reviews & forum postings
that mention Am I Going Mad

More than anything, Australian author Marlyse Carroll’s book Am I Going Mad offers a very nice overview of psychology, incorporating lots of the ideas of Jung and criticising the western mania to label things as “sick” when they are merely different or a little difficult. Marlyse points out that the spiritual journey has always been a difficult one, with many phases along the way, but in recent years we have been encouraged to think that somehow any divergence from the norm is somehow “sick.”

She tells lots of wonderful stories – some of them quite distressing and outrageous – based on her own experiences. These are often quite archetypal in nature, reflecting the universality of the Jungian journey. She also recounts some wonderful experiences, like learning to dance as a simple expression of the soul.

The overwhelming message of the book is that fundamentally Jungian one of embracing the shadow self.

The whole book is describing the intense spiritual journey in a very honest way, highlighting the challenges and the pitfalls, and assuring the reader that they are all worth it. Carroll is actually a solid and scholarly writer, and this book is quite serious in its intent. She draws from many of the best spiritual, psychological and scientific thinkers to present this overview, and it is really quite an impressive effort.

She sites mystical consciousness (as opposed to mental illness) in Jung’s described space of the transpersonal. At least, I think I got that right – like I said, this is weighty stuff. She also incorporates ideas of kundalini, using the chakras to illustrate the stages of a person’s journey towards true selfhood.

Walter Mason

Orange buy now button


If you have read Am I going Mad and would like to give us feedback, please include your comments below. Thank you.

Leave a Reply